100WC- Molly D

As the sun came out from behind the unpromising clouds, the beach filled with lashings of light. People rejoiced merrily from behind their in-progress sandcastles and sand-filled picnics. Finally, the sun was on the human’s side! There were people from the north, south, east and west. They all seemed to dance in the sunlight. This was because; weather in Great Britain is unpredictable!

As the immortal tide bounced in and out, locals and travellers came and went. Seagulls squawked and flew endlessly around the sea and the bay, stealing peoples sandwiches mischievously. At last, the beach became lonely and deserted.

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25 thoughts on “100WC- Molly D

  1. I love the line ‘they all seemed to dance in the sunlight’. I’m sure this might be what happens in the sunshine but it has been so long I can’t remember!

    Your use of vocabulary continues to improve – well done. I wonder whether immortal is an appropriate word with which to describe the tide. Can you explain why you chose it?

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  2. Molly, I am very impressed with this short story. Your writing has an almost poetic feel to it. Some interesting vocabulary, you really set the scene for the reader. I would love to read more of your work.

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  3. I liked when the part when you said unpromsing clouds.I liked the part were you said the beach filled with lashings.i wish you could include 3 or 4a sentences

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  4. i really liked this sentence “As the sun came out from behind the unpromising clouds, the beach filled with lashings of light.” I also liked the word unpromising.But an improvment would be to add some noun who wich sentences”.e.g the seagulls, which were white and pale, skwaked loudly”

    Well done!

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  5. I like the way you wrote unpromising clouds and I also like the way you wrote the beach filled with lashings of lights. You can improve on an emotion comma word sentence.

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  6. Molly I really like this adjectetive “unpromising clouds” and I like your puncuation like an explanation mark. I think that you could improve by adding a 2a sentence such as The bioling,sun arose from the blue sky.

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  7. i like the word unpredictable.
    i also like the word unpromised.
    try to include sentence types to make it a little bit better

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  8. Molly, I really like how you described the clouds by saying unpromising and I like how you said the sun was on the humans side. You can improve by adding more sentence types like emotion word comer hot, the sun was on the humans side

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  9. i like it when it says the immortal bounced in and out and when you wrote the weather in great britan is unpredictble i think you could add more adverbs like the immortal waves rapidly bounced in and out.

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  10. molly your writing is amazing i love your description and your adjectives but one thing you can improve on is using some commas i hope you can post more of your outstanding work looking foward to seeing another one soon from shifa and her friend nimra

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  11. Well done Molly, I am very impressed with this short story. Your writing has an almost poetic feel to it. Some interesting vocabulary, you really set the scene for the reader. & please add some more adjectives. Keep up the Brilliant Work! =]

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  12. Hi i liked it when you said ”lonely and deserted”, i think your writing is great. You can improve by putting a bit more adjectives!!

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  13. hi i love your writing because you have put some adjective,another i like it is
    i love the way you said “lonley and deserted”.
    the thing that needs to improve is put some more adjective

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  14. I like your words saying north,south,east and west also your adjectives and you can improve by adding people saying stuff and with speech marks. hope people say nice stuff acout you.

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  15. Me and Abbas really loved your writing and descriptive vocabulary it was most AMAZING,but I wouldn’t describe the tides as immortal sincerely Anees and Abbas.

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  16. I LIKE WEN YOU SAID IMORTAL BOUNCED. IN AND OUT YOU CAN IMPROVE BY PUTTING MORE ADJECTIVES.HOPE SEEING MORE.

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  17. Dear Molly
    Wow, this blog is good. You really good vocabulary. For example when you said “As the sun came out from behind the unpromising clouds, the beach filled with lashings of light.”
    I also liked how you described it. For example when you said “At last, the beach became lonely and deserted.” it was good describing.
    I wish you would of put a question. If you put a question more people will comment to answer your question.
    From Dorian

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  18. Dear Molly,
    This post was brilliant. I just love your use of great vocabulary words. They make the story came alive. Like the story has a poetic feel to it.
    Also I love how you put so many phrases. This made the story sound so smooth. As I was reading it, it felt like a perfectly blended smoothie sliding down my throat.
    The only thing that you were missing was a picture or a question. Like if you put a picture of a smiling sun over a crowd of people, that would be awesome.
    Truly yours,
    Asha

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